A new paradigm of desire and abundance

For the last 3 years I have been living a simple life, outside of mainstream society as much as possible. I have consciously allowed programming and social conditioning to seep out of my being. I let my leg and armpit hair grow out to its natural length. I stopped wearing a bra and make up. For several months in Thailand I didn't use shoes at all. I have lived with very few belongings (thanks must be given to my lovely mum for storing the stuff I am still hanging on to!).

 

In this time I have been mostly wearing sarongs, casual beach dresses and woolly ponchos. I had no interest in going into boutiques and shopping for fancy dresses any more. That was something that I enjoyed doing in the past when I lived in London and Bangkok, but as I got swept up attaching to this new identity of ‘hippy' I rejected the possibility of shopping for luxurious clothes.

 

There was a deeper process happening too... I would quietly judge people who did like to go shopping for expensive, beautiful, unnecessary items. I would judge those people as being unevolved because they were focusing on material pleasures instead of pursuing spiritual fulfilment. My mind wanted to believe it has to be only one way or the other: an ascetic, simple, spiritual lifestyle (judged as pure and holy) or a materially luxurious lifestyle (judged as indulgent, egotistical and spiritually immature). Such dualistic thinking... oh spiritual ego, I love you so much, bless you! 

 

For many centuries religious conditioning has taught that in order to be 'spiritual' we have to give up material pleasures or even take a vow of poverty. Many of us may be carrying these beliefs deep within our subconscious memories from monastic past lives. These beliefs are still alive and well in our mainstream culture now too - sayings like 'money is the root of all evil' are commonly used.

 

Finally, I am coming to a point where I can embrace both sides of myself. Yes, I am a spirit, who loves meditation and prayer and ultimately has no needs... but I am also a human who loves delicious food, soft fabrics, well-cut clothes and beautifully spacious accommodation. There is no wrong/right here. Choosing one does not mean rejecting the other - to reject or deny the human desires just creates more separation and duality in my being.

 

So... is it possible to have it all? I think so. I can now consciously choose to play in the illusion of 3D reality, without getting lost in it. I can wear gorgeous delicate skirts over my hairy legs! I'm going to have a lot of fun exploring this. It's OK to desire beautiful things. Let's enjoy the pleasures of this brief human experience we've been gifted! Sending so much love.

 

1 February 2021